How NOT to talk/chat with strangers

In case you don’t know already, Omegle is a website where you go and chat with entirely random strangers, no signing in or any nonsense. You just chat. Unfortunately or fortunately, you don’t know who you’re chatting WITH.

These are some of my most random and pointless omegle convos, inspired by funny stuff I’ve read on the internet.

Omegle is beast. Trolling on Omegle is even better.

Number 1

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : FUCKIT

Stranger : Asl plz

You : OI I’m in trouble

Stranger : ???

You : Straya sucks

Stranger : what??

You : Straya sucks man

Stranger : whats straya

You : Australia. Its the cool aussie waytosayit

Stranger : what happened?

You : I was sitting in my boat, alone, in this swamp

You : Playing with my boomerang

You : When I dropped my sandwich in the water

You : When I went to get it

You : A croc grabbed me

Stranger : WHY the hell are you on omegle then?! GET a doc!!!

You : Why? WHY??!!

You : I get 3G reception only here thats why.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Number 2

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

Stranger : Heyyyyy

You : Heyyyyy

Stranger : asl

You : asl

Stranger : I asked first

You : So?

Stranger : so gimme

You : no

Stranger : come on

You : i cant tell you my location

Stranger : why not?

You : union rules

Stranger : lol. seriously..why not?

You : its a state secret

Stranger : state secret? wtf are you??

You : i cannot tell you that either

Stranger : try me

You : after i do, i will have to hunt you down and eliminate you

Stranger : crap

You : i am 006, aka rip torn, james bonds bro

Stranger : fuck you

You have disconnected.

Number 3

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : hey shawty

Stranger : excuse me?

You : hey shawty

Stranger : lol asl

You : 16/f/morocco. my name is ruby

Stranger : thats cool. im 40/m/landon

You : that is so nice

Stranger : So have you got pics?

You : please wait i will send you link

Stranger : take your time sweetheart!

You : http://tv.rightcelebrity.com/wp-content/photos/Ruby_Heartthrob.jpg

Stranger : wow you’re hot

You : you’re right this was after my bunga bunga with the PM

Stranger : what PM?

You : silvio

Stranger : who? what you talking about?

You : italian PM silvio berlusconi’s bunga bunga party

Stranger : yeah right

You : exactly. PERV IM A YOUNG GIRL GO ROT IN HELL CRASH IN THE MOON I HOPE THE MOON EXPLODES AFTER YOU CRASH INTO IT AND ALL THE PARTICLES CRASH INTO THE SUN

You : PEDO IM CALLING THE COPS

You have disconnected.

Number 4

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : anger

Stranger : asl

You : no im seriously hulking out

Stranger : lol

You : must…not……….become…………………..big……………………..greeen…………monstaaaaaaaaa

Stranger : lol

Stranger : hello?

You : hey who is this? this laptop just flew in via my window and i saw a green man jumping away

Stranger : jesus

You : you’re jesus!!? i am blessed!!!!

Stranger : no

Stranger : a green man? you’ve got to be fuckin kiddin me

You : no i swear on you jesus

Stranger : i am not jesus

You : good becoz im satan

Stranger : are you high man?

You : pretty low if you ask me

You : right under you

Stranger : lol this is funny

You : i know i am. why don’t you join me for some kebabs

Your conversational partner has disconnected

Number 5

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : hello

You : you walk into a room and see a big flash what do you do?

Stranger : I walk out

You : wrong. that was a flash bang. you are a terrorist scum

You : you have lost the game

You have disconnected

Number 6

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : That guy is such a douche

Stranger : who?

You : Pappy, at the mall

Stranger : hmm yeah

You : you know him too?

Stranger : yeah

You : I dont like people who know pappy. DOUCHEBAG GOODBYE FOREVER I HATE YOU

You have disconnected

Number 7

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : Hello check out my hot pics at mlisa90xxx.com

Stranger : spambot!!

You : Hey there

Stranger : youre a spambot

You : Wanna see my hot pics

Stranger : no i dont want to spambot

You : too bad douche, coz i really am hot B)

You have disconnected

Number 8

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : hey

You : im stuck on my couch and cant reach my phone

You : can you call the police

Stranger : lawl

You : no seriously, i cant reach my bacon and honey

You : im too big for this sofa

You : i think ill die here

Stranger : you fat slob

You : just call the cops

Stranger : where do you live

You : LA. you?

Stranger : canada

You : OH FUCKING HELL POINTLESS CANADA BEGONE YOU POINTLESS RANDOM CANADIAN

You have disconnected

Number 9

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : woohooo this is funn

Stranger : what is?

You : k im on my segway on the I-95 near dallas cops on my tail

Stranger : Really?

You : yep!! its on auto and im on omegle!!

Stranger : :D!

You : shit cops on my back

Stranger : Shit!

You : dont worry i will ninja my way out of this

You : there’s a bridge somewhere

Stranger : Hey wait the I-95 isnt even near dallas

You : what dallas?

Stranger : You said you were on a segway near dallas on the I95

You : what?

You : segway? dallas? I95?

You : you’re high

Stranger : I think you are

Stranger :

.._|\____________________,,_

../ `–||||||||————————-] ===(——) Youre dead

./_==o ____________________|

…),—.(_(__) /

..// (\) ),—-“.’

.//___//

/`—-‘ /

____ /

You : shit you just shot me

You : go to fucking china you communist

You have disconnected

Number 10

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You : BOB MARLEY IS MY MAN

Stranger : I smell weed

You : I smoke weed

Stranger : WTF

You : that was weird

You : the last person i know smoked weed got shot

You : IN THE LEG

Stranger : SMOKE THE SMOKEY SMOKE ITS COLORFULLY WIERD

You : THIS IS AN AWESOME CONVERSATION

Stranger : I SEE DRUNK MEXICAN UNICORNS

You : I SEE FLASHING LIGHTS AND PINK TOWELS

Stranger : POKEMON FTW

You : ARGENTINA SUCKS

Stranger : I WILL EAT POKEMON

You : SAUTEE THEM THEY ARE DELICIOUZ

Stranger : THANKS I EAT THEM AS THEY ARE

Stranger : PIKACHU TASTES LIKE SOFA

You : FUNNY MY CELLPHONE SAID THE SAME THING

Stranger : ELLEN DENGERESE IS A MAN

You : MY AC IS BREATHING N02 AND MOVING AWAY FROM ME AT 300 MILES AN HOUR

Stranger : hahahaha!!!!

You : The best random conversation I have had. Goodbye

You have disconnected

About Butt Chocolate

Perennially jobless. Eternally Vetti. Totally Awesome.

Posted on March 20, 2011, in Lists. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. BEST BLOG POST EVER

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