Attention Women from Chennai (& especially down South)

What’s wrong with guys?

We Can’t Keep Our Eyes Off Women.

That’s something which is programmed into us as humans and let me welcome you into our planet if you were oblivious of this for so long. Now to address the problem with the other half of humanity in our city :

Let me give you a simple eye test to demonstrate :

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Now, acting talent aside, the abomination that is Exhibit B can easily be dismissed at the first glance due to 2 reasons :
  • No sense of Style.
  • Smug Self-Satisfaction (at Wtf) ?!
Now girls, if you’re wondering what this has got to do with you, the two reasons cited above are EXACTLY what the problem is.
We guys walk out to the street or in our college campuses and what do we see ?
A vibrant display of yellows and greens and pinks with/without patterns of odd alien flowers or leaves or some geometrically challenged images and they’re called “Chudidhar” or whatever.
Gonna call me a foreign import eh ? Hold that thought..
We all have EYES and we DON’T LIKE what we see.
There’s this age-old complaint about how the ‘Northie chicks’ are SOO much hotter and it’s not so in Chennai and down south.
The sad thing is, it’s all true.. and it has NOTHING to do with complexion at all.
The basic difference is, the women there make an effort to look attractive/presentable whatever (Editor from Mumbai : Absolutely true) They don’t step out of the house with a Margo face wash and some Gokul Santol on their necks.
The worst part is, when all of you get into universities with ‘strict’ rules, you give up. That’s what girls are good at apparently and it shows. But that doesn’t mean you have to dress like you don’t care a damn about what the world thinks.
The world thinks a lot about you, woman.
It’s not like any of us have (or claim to have) any knowledge about cosmetics or clothing but hey, that’s right up your alley, if you don’t there must be some friends who know something…right ?…RIGHT ?!!!
Some doubts guys might have (I do certainly) :
  • Have most of you ever even worked out once ?
  • What’s the third most important thing in your lives after Grades and Books ?
  • Are you Completely unaware of the stark difference in looks between you and the models in the media ?
  • Your parents make rules, are you a lamb to follow every single one including NOT looking hot ?
  • You let your parents pick your Clothes ?!
I most definitely don’t mean these to every woman out there. But then, as a critical observer, I’ll have to peg the approximate percentage of women with no sense of looks at a sad 95% in our city (being Chennai).
For those wonderful 5% of women out there, you’re always in hand with a boyfriend and they would have the lions’ share of stalking, leering, drooling and vicious, catty scowls (from the 95%).
This kind of puts us in a jeopardy : HOW do we go after a girl who might of course, be charismatic and whatever, if we see an auntie in the making walking past ?
It’s a fundamental aspect of being human, to be your best…and grades don’t count with you neglecting your persona..
Anyhow, whenever you step out, know that there WILL be a million eyes on you by evening and those eyes will judge you and I know it’s harsh, but if you put some effort, it would be well rewarded with open mouthed stares and perhaps a guy who might give you the all important affection a 9.5 GPA might not give you.

Like I would, for her.

Post Script(22/10/11) :

OKAY..I’ve been called shallow by nearly 20 females who read this and by some dude in this very blog, LET me clarify once and for all what i Expect PERSONALLY :



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Posted on June 25, 2011, in Just For Laughs. Bookmark the permalink. 18 Comments.

  1. Ha ha .. Chennai guys suck too you know
    They are
    1) They look like absolute poriki-s. They think being loud and rude is cool – but actually is a huge turn off
    2) They have a pot belly – 1 out of 10 guys actually try going to a gym
    3) They are geeks. Which is actually not a bad thing.. But they tend to be anti-social and can only talk about how Firefox 5 works really bad on Ubuntu 11.09 — which is a shame
    4) They are Hot. They are Smart. They are taken πŸ™‚
    5) They are fine. Single. Talk well. But then they start clinging. (Ewww!)

    Am very sorry. But those are the types I see.
    So. Please.

  2. Dude, wat an insighttt!!!

  3. And the worst part is when you’r yelled at by your parents cos guys stare at you open-mouthed and guess what? Its our fault that they stare at us! Sick it is! Its not always a luxury!

  4. princesscrazy

    But when guys stare not-so-decently or try to follow you home or anything like that, not dressing attractively seems like a very good option. 😐

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