I hate using my mobile phones, so I’ve made a quick list of things that I hate about the service providers. I have avoided naming them wherever possible, incase they come across this blog and sue my ass (they’ve done it before, stupid corporate bastards).
1. Have they even got towers? Their network sucks.
As I’ve mentioned repeatedly, I have 3 sim cards. The network on all 3 suck. Loop Mobile, for example, had exceptional dBm strength wherever I went a year back. It was so good, infact, that they gave the good citizens of Mumbai a challenge – if there are call drops, they’ll reimburse the money back into our cards.
Then the call drops actually started happening and the signal became weaker over time. Now, it’s useless talking with my Loop sim even when I’m hanging out the window because it has become genuinely horrible. I’m not going to get started on the other two sims, but note that they’re equally horrible.
My network dropped from an average of 3-4 bars to 1-2 bars all the time, even when I’m outside. Why?
2. Roaming is anti-democratic.
So here I am, with 3 Mumbai sims. Apparently, if I go out of Mumbai to say, Chennai, then my sims are as useful as the gray stuff that comes out of my nose.
No seriously, its bad. My Loop sim roams on Idea’s network and charges me all the heavens (and all the hells) so I’m pretty much broke by the time I return to Mumbai. Why does roaming even exist as a concept? For the companies to make more money?
Different “circles” within the same country makes sense if it exists only for administrative purposes, not for anything else. Roaming doesn’t exist in the United States, for example, and the US is much bigger than India.
I don’t see the logic – If I buy a Chennai sim from Chennai, and I have use it in Madurai, my wallet spontaneously combusts because I’m in a different “circle”, meaning the Chennai circle is not the same as Tamil Nadu circle. But Chennai is in Tamil Nadu, so WTF?
Seriously, who sits and thinks of these things? Thank God roaming has been done away with by the Telecom minister Kapil Sibal. Now that this has happened, I’m sure the providers are plotting alternative methods to indulge in such blatant thievery.
No no, just watch. They’ve already said “the price war has cooled down” which basically means mobile call prices (which dropped to an all time low of 1p/3 sec) are now going to rise. I strongly smell a cartel here, and plenty of unfair trade practices. Seriously I do.
3. It’s 24×7 robbery when it comes to SMSes.
I just read on Cracked.com that SMS’es shouldn’t even cost a pie. I get most of my info from Cracked.com, so I’m more than compelled to believe something like that, especially when the New York Times also stated the same thing.
I’m not going to post any links since none of you click on them anyway, but I’ll explain in my own inimitable style.
So it works like this : There are 2 routes for your mobile phone to talk to the tower. One of these routes is in contact with the tower all the time. It sends out packets of data that are 160 characters long and tells the tower shit like where you are, how you’re doing and where you’re going.
SMSes are sent on this route. So here’s the shocker – whether you’re actually messaging someone or not, it sends out these packets anyway. Have you ever wondered why a message is 160 characters long? It’s because of this. Your SMS (when sent) just piggybacks on these packets to the tower and then to the other mobile phone at the other end. So when it says “You don’t have free messages left” or “You don’t have any money left to message”, you can safely call the loudest bullshit ever because that’s exactly what it is.
It should go, whether or not you have any money. The providers are fully aware of this and have exploited this ignorance in their idiot consumers and charge the fucking roof for messaging.
And what the FUCK, seriously, 1 Re/msg on festival days? I’m insanely angry because today is Diwali and I’m getting robbed right before my eyes every single time I message someone.
What kind of fuckassed logic is this? This is the one day when there are no restrictions on messaging (otherwise its 100 smses a day), this is the one day when we can wish everyone we know and they charge us a fucking buck a pop?
That’s just saturated with corporate dickishness. It’s just absurd. Why should I be charged 1000% more (I use Loop) to message people just because it’s a festival day?
And with what BALLS are these guys saying they’re making losses? That’s bullshit. No that’s not just bullshit, that’s the worst kind of hippo-fly-roach-shit you can have thrown at you.
And if they’re not making losses, why can’t they cut costs?
4. Mobile Internet is TFU.
I have a lot of friends who use Blackberry. So some of them pay 399 a month to use Facebook (the BB app), BBM, email checking and downloading BB apps from the Blackberry Market.
That’s it. 399 a month on fucking 2G for this shit? They can’t use the internet, they can’t browse neither can they watch YouTube or see normal websites.
That’s stupid. This is where I love DoCoMo. They want 95 bucks a month to use 6 gigaBITS of all kinds of internet for a month. 6 gigaBITS or 6Gb is equivalent to nearly 1 gigaBYTE or 1 GB. That’s good enough. I don’t know why Blackberry users are getting their money eaten from out of their hands. Is it because they have a Blackberry? There’s just no sense in that to me at all.
Also, telecom providers fail to make a distinction all the time about this gigabits gigabytes thing. I was totally amazed first, when I heard that DoCoMo had this kickassed plan. I was also a little suspicious and my suspicions were confirmed when I checked my usage on my Android and converted it.
TO BE NOTED : If the “b” is small (in the ads), then it’s Gigabits and if its a big “B” then its Gigabytes. And the ads are not always clear. So if you think you’ve signed up for a Gigabytes thing, and you are getting less than anticipated internet usage, then you may have just been trolled. If you’re in the mood and have the time and money, go and sue their ass.
Oh and 3G. Oh 3G. 3G in India has failed miserably so far. Like the worst fail in the history of worst fails. Airtel (a simcard I don’t use) asks for 450 bucks A MONTH to use 3G internet. Only 1GB is free. I’m not going to use more than I already use for DoCoMo, but I pay nearly 5 times more for what?
Pathetic 3G network and so-called better speeds? That’s an absurd premise to blow hard-earned money. I’m not that desperate to use the internet anyway. I”ll just come home and use it over wifi, and also be satisfied with my economical 2G that Tata offers me.
So..do you have any thing that you hate about Indian telecom that I missed? Or do you think I’m wrong? Let me know, by commenting in that nice white space below.